So I read this article this weekend posted on a Facebook page. It deals with how to date a person with Anxiety. It struck home for me as I have severe anxiety and depression lately due to things happening with my Divorce and life in general. When I read it I thought, “man the guy I’m seeing really needs to read this!” I found he likes to push me, and not in ways I enjoy to be pushed. He wants to see me all the time, have sex constantly and is very hard headed. When I read this article it re-affirmed for me that I need to move onto greener pastures. Someone who understands my anxiety and doesn’t think it’s a head problem that can just go away…his words, not mine… I wanted to share the article on here as a reminder:
How an Anxious Person wants to be loved
They want you to understand their “personal days.
They love spending time with you, they really do. It’s just that they need time alone to gather their racing thoughts.
Anxiety can be debilitating to the point where you really have to take care of yourself, even more so than others. So don’t feel insecure when they say they’d like to be alone. It’s not you, it really is them.
They want to make sure they’re alright, so they can be alright around you.
They want you to support them, not discipline them.
When you watch them break down and succumb to that anxiety attack, it can be so easy to give them advice on what they can do to get better.
Resist that temptation because it’s important to them that you know you’re their lover, not their therapist.
In that moment when their heart is pounding, chest is pain, and their lungs are hot and tight, they don’t want to talk, they want to be held. Nothing is more relaxing than your comfort.
Let them worry about you.
Don’t tell them to stop worrying about you, instead reassure them that you’ll be fine.
It’s tempting to tell them not to worry about you, but honestly, there’s no point. Worrying about you is one of the many ways they show their love because they care about you and they don’t want anything bad to happen to you.
But alas, anxious thoughts won’t let them go. You cough and for them, that means cancer. You come a few minutes late, and to them, that means you almost got hit by a bus. They know it’s irrational but they really can’t help it.
Love them gently.
Take your time loving them because they really love you. They may not show it, but they do. The thing is they’re fighting to take their lives back from anxiety. They’re healing from all the pain it’s caused.
Be gentle when you hug them because they’re fragile even when they’re strong.
By Marie Cyprien for PuckerMob